Failure and Dreams: Widening the Field So You Can Succeed

“I've missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I've failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.” – Michael Jordan

Taking actions towards our dreams can be really difficult for many reasons. On the surface we have practical and well thought out concerns. But underneath those concerns usually hides 2 emotions: fear and doubt.

It’s totally natural to fear taking risks and trying new things – it comes up for everyone. Here’s the not so good news: in order to follow your dreams, you have to being willing to take risks and fail. Failing’s part of learning, growing, and creating a meaningful life. And it’s inevitable that hard stuff’s going to come up and you’re going to fail sometimes. But don’t worry, you will learn from that and it’s all part of the process.

In fact, the closer we come to the next level in our lives, to new success, the bigger our fear gets. EXCEPT, it doesn’t always LOOK like fear; it looks like good sense. We calculate costs and benefits, try to find ways to come out ahead, and look good while doing it. But those things can just keep us from taking action. If you go in search of your dreams you will can pretty much count on coming up against your fears. So what will allow you to pull a Michael Jordan and go out on the court and risk it… and then, here’s the key, STAY and keep trying?

To get into action you might try actually accepting the fear and learning how to work with it so you can keep showing up to take a shot. Failure is only when you give up, when you walk away. It gets fueled by thoughts like “next year,” “next time,” “others can do this, not me.” If you find a way to keep showing up, as you miss shot after shot, or as you launch some pretty ridiculously looking throws, odds are great that you will: begin to learn, grow, and, most importantly, change what’s possible for you. 

I challenge you to create a life where you can take more risks and learn to become more comfortable with “missing the shot.” So, how to widen your ability to tolerate missing the shot? To risk not being perfect and to keep showing up? You could try…

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• Get a team! – Get support from friends/mentors/colleagues who celebrate your willingness to get on that court and hold your bigger vision of where you are going.
• Create an Inner Game Plan! – If a good friend were about to go out and attempt something hard (possibly in public!), what advice would you give them? Apply it to yourself!

• Have a post-game plan! – Before you start, have elements in place should you fail OR succeed! How will you review what happened, find your wins, locate what was difficult, and then, most crucially, find enough learning in there to develop the motivation to show up for another game? 

These are just a few thoughts. Perhaps they will spark more for you? I do know this… the more we widen our tolerance for missing the shot, the more we create the ability to live a life in line with our gifts and values. What shot are you willing to take until you make it this week?
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I celebrate each and every little attempt you make. And I am out there doing it daily.

All the Best To You,

Jen

P.S.
Contact me and let me know what topics YOU would like to see in this blog!

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